i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
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