They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Randomize
