I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Randomize
