Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Randomize
