Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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