Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
Use "feeling words"
Yay
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
Randomize