I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
Randomize
