Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
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