i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
