i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
sex in a hospital.. check
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Randomize
