Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
