end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Randomize
