we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
I wish you could order shots online.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
i came on her dog
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
