The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
