But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
ttyl tear gas
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize
