Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Randomize
