been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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