i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
