I'm gonna have a badass scar
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
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