do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
