I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
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