Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
Randomize
