Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Randomize
