My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
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