is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Randomize
