Dude. I just woke up without a shirt or bra on. Apparently I fell asleep with a quesadilla in my mouth. I can feel my liver hating me.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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