Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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