I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Randomize
