His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
