Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Randomize
