WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
