Dude, this chick just tossed my salad hard. All that I could picture was a dog trying to get the last of the peanut butter out of the jar of Jiff and trying not to think of how grotesque my last dump was.
Then she tried to kiss me and I wouldn't and she got pissed off and went to sleep. Then about an hour later, her kid called her. She went home and on the way out I told her to wash her mouth before she kissed her kid good night. Weird night..
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
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