Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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