do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Randomize
