i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Randomize
