Well apparently he's into motor boating.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Randomize
