is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
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