I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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