At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize
