we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
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