when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
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