I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
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