please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Do you have feelings for this penis?
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
