You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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