if you like me you must not know who I am
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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