dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Randomize
