i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Randomize
