Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
