I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
Randomize
