is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
